It's time!!!

It's time for me to step out of the dark hole... and come out to be ma old self again... wish me luck... XD

do i still know how to appreciate anything??!!

Everytime when someone is very busy with everything when i'm trying to chat with them... the only thing i do is to blame them for not wanting to chat with me... the only thing in my mind is:"why won't they chat with me?? it's not like i'll be taking a very long time or so..." but... i never think of how busy they are... how much do they wish to have some time of mine to do their stuff... all i do is just blame, blame and blame...

All i do is just blaming them for not letting me know them well enough... but i didn't think about how could i get to know them without disturbing them... only after when i looked at their blogs... then i found out how much are they willing to tell me about themselves... and also that i'm just nothing but a selfish and irritating and annoying person... always disturbing them without caring about how they feel... starting to hate myself... can i ever change?? i thought i changed a lot since last time... but then... now only i realised... i haven't changed a bit since then... seriously need time to settle myself down... but how long do i need?? forever?? do i still know myself?? starting to wonder... how well do i know myself...

自找。。。

最近才发现到。。。很多东西都是自找的。。。也许很多人都已经这样认为了吧。。。我也不是不知道。。。只是不敢去面对和接受这个事实。。。身边的人对我也不差。。。却不太懂得去珍惜他们。。。开始越来越讨厌我自己。。。为什么会这个样子。。。为什么总是爱钻牛角尖。。。都不能放开一些。。。是因为累了吗？？还是没东西能够让我有个寄托呢？？每次只会怪别人。。。却不会看看自己做了什么让到他们会这样。。。真的开始越来越讨厌自己了。。。我到底能不能从这一个黑暗有孤独的洞出来呢？？完全不知道。。。唉。。。我。。。还走得下去没有呢？？走不下去也没办法。。。根本就不能再回头了。。。我到底还需要多长的时间啊？？！！！！

Friends.... Who are they actually??

Well... Just to clarify... This post is not about my friends(except a few that calls me friends but... )Lol...

Well... in my world... a friend... is actually quite simple to be defined... he/she is just a person that you would help whenever you can... and will also help you whenever he/she can...no asking or pleading or begging or whatever needed... just a glance and he/she'll know what to do...*ma english sucks!!!*

But... Nowadays...in the so called "real world" or "reality"... friends are just simply people who you can talk along with... can just crap about anything... and make you feel that you don't have any responsibilities at the moment(only)... what my parents call "can hee-hee-haa-haa" with... but when the time comes that you need their help desperately(of course it's something serious, or else i won't use the word desperately... XD) ... they'll just walk away from you... and o yea... i forgot to add... whenever they need your help... they'll treat you very very very very very well(speak nicely to you.. give you some treats... give you whatever you want... "polish your shoes" until you can even look at your face with it... etc. etc.) ... and after helping them... without a "thanks"... they'll just walk away as if you never helped them at all... wow... i'm starting to regret helping these people again and again and again and again and again... well... you get what i mean... and also... after helping you... they'll just describe the tiny little favour they did for you into something like:"well... i've saved your life from being killed by (whatever you're most afraid of... fill in the blank... XD)" wow... are they just great in claiming for gratitudes and helps or what... Summary: they're just the people who wants you to help them without expecting any rewards... but only helping you if there's some 利害关系／利益关系...

well... luckily... for most of these people around me... i don't really get that close to them... our relationship is either "working partners" or what i like to call "hi-bye-friend"... which... i don't have to be so helpful with them and i don't need to ask for their help either... XD we'll just say a hi and bye whenever we meet... that's all... XD

what's happening in this society?? what's causing these people to behave like this??!! still in search for the answer... can anyone give me the answer or at least guide me to the answer?? getting very frustrated seeing these people around me... can i at least make them change that little bit?? to at least care for the people around them with their heart but not their minds which are always thinking about what will they get in the end?? don't think so... i can just hope that the situation get a bit better... that's all... damn pissed off!!! frustrated!!! tired!!! sick!!! damn!!!



From: Shawn
Zuo Hao

11.05pm 21/11/2008 friday

Walking into others' life... and leaving it... without leaving anything behind... none at all...

There's a rule in Forest reserves... "take nothing but photographs... and leave nothing but footsteps..."

Am i not even comparable to a forest?? yea... maybe i am... i'm seriously very surprised that i can get to know someone... and i thought i knew the persons quite well... and suddenly... i found out that i'm just a nothing in everyone's life and memories... it's just like i don't even exist in their worlds... is it my own problem?? or is it their fault?? guess it's my own problem... maybe i'm just too annoying and irritating to be remembered... this world is seriously a very dangerous place... or maybe it's just because i'm too lazy and lousy to face everything?? looks like everything's my oen problem... guess i can't just blame others... it's all my fault.. *siiiiiiiiiiighsssssssssssss*

looks like i'll have to get used to walking into others' memories without leaving a trace inside... although i failed to do so since i was born................ it's a hard thing to do.......... hope i'll succeed...



林宥嘉 - 再别康桥

轻轻的我走了
正如我轻轻的来
我轻轻地招手
作别西天的云彩

那河畔的金柳
是夕阳中的新娘
波光里的艳影
在我心头荡漾

寻梦撑一支一支长篙
向青草更青处漫溯
满载一船一船星辉
在星辉斑斓里放歌

软泥上的青荇
油油的在水底招摇
在康河的柔波里
我甘心做一条水草

那榆阴下的一潭
不是清泉是天上虹
揉碎在浮藻间
沉淀着彩虹似的梦

但我不能不能放歌
悄悄是别离的笙箫
夏虫也为我为我沉默
沉默是今晚的康桥

悄悄的我走了走了
正如我悄悄的来
我挥一挥衣袖衣袖
不带走一片云彩



突然爱上了这首歌。。。它是在说我心情吗？？不是啊。。。它是安宁吗？？ 适合在睡觉的时候听吗？？ 可是在这个时候的我。。。觉得它很灰。。。很蓝。。。一听就渗入我的心。。。完全不需问过我的允许。。。唉。。。我不是轻轻地走。。。而是无声息地走了。。。我没挥衣袖。。。留不下东西。。。却带走了很多回忆。。。自私的我。。。有可能能够适应这种生活吗？？不知道。。。但愿答案能够在终有一天被我找到吧。。。

HK Dramas...

Hey guyz... just want to introduce this website to you... this is where i download my astro on demand dramas... XD if i'm not mistaken... about 99% of the dramas are there... accompanied by drama synopsis and also other details... XD feel free to go visit the website... the link is on my blog list... mushiemoshiu... XD Just go to the "My Favourite Drama" site after going to the link... XD Enjoy...

Tagged by Mrs. Jung... T_T""

Name 20 people randomly. At the end of the survey, choose 5 people to do the survey. Don't read the questions but name the 20 people first...
01.Sai Lou Happylouis
02.Korx TC
03.Chee Tat
04.GrandNephew Chee Ching
05.Kar Yee
06.Seow May
07.Ching Sin
08.YH
09.Korx SY
10.Cai Yi
11.Miss Q
12.Leng Ooi
13.Yi Jing
14.Susen
15.Daron
16.Jin Bang
17.The person who tagged me Mrs. Jung
18.Greffer
19.Snoopy
20.Woodstock

1.How did you meet number 18?
Lol... err... he's my erhu teacher...met him the first day i learnt erhu... XD

2. What will happen if you have not met number 17?
I won't be tagged now... XD

3. What if number 9 and 20 dated?
SY n woodstock ar... err... lol... They'll be gay... XD

4. What if number 5 and 10 dated?
Kar Yee n Cai Yi... err... speechless...

5. Describe number 1.
Best person ever in my life... XD

6. Do you think number 8 is attractive?
Lol... YH ar... err... yea lar... he spent only about 3 days to let 99% of form 6 to get to know about him... XD is he not attractive or what??!!

7. Describe number 7.
Hmn... The girl who always hits me really hard on my arms... *pain*

8. Do you know any family members of 12?
Err... Went to her house before... seen her parents... but not her brothers... XD Her mom can really bake!!!!

9. What languages do number 15 speak?
He ar... cantonese and english lor... and also a little bit of "cacated" Chinese... XD

10. Who is number 9 hanging out with?
Lol... I hope i know... XD o yea... his viola?? XD

11. How old is number 16 this year?
Err... He should be bigger than me by 2 years... 19?? XD

12. Who's number 2 favourite singer?
Err... Singer... I don't know... Musician?? Yanni!!! XD

13. When is the last time you spoke to number 13?
Err... Let's see......................................................................

14. Have you ever dated number 4?
I'm not a gay... Lol...

15. Would you ever date number 19?
Lol... Should i say... NEVER!!! ?? XD

16. Is number 3 single?
Yes he is... hmn... I wonder he's still available?? He quite a nice guy... Girls... Better grab him fast... XD

17. What is number 10 last name?
YI

18. Would you be in a relationship with number 11?
Lol... Miss Q ar... I think she's not available liao lor... XD In the future?? Lol... She's like... Uni grad. liao... XD

19. What is the school of number 13?
She was in CHS as well... Now ar... UTM... XD

20. Where does number 6 stay?
Not telling... XD

21. What is your favourite thing about number 5?
Err... She can be quite caring if she wants to... XD

22. Have you ever seen number 14 naked?
NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh,this is cool...gonna tag some 38 frens to play with:
Dowan tag lar... feel very bad after tagging... XD

Tagged by Ah Tam

Instructions:Remove 1 question from below and add in a personal question, make it a total of 19 questions. Then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged.

1. What are your nicknames?
Shawn... PMO: Zuo Hao... XD

2. What is your most favourite thing to do?
Sleep... Table Tennis... MUSIC!!!!!!!!!(Ma life) ... Food(Vegetarian only... XD)

3. What kind of news do you read?
Anything I find interesting...

4. What would you give up in return to eat all you want in the world and not get fat?
Anything nice! but only vegetarian... T_T""

6. Do you believe you can survive without money?
if i'm able to eat "tree skins"... lol

7. What are you afraid to lose the most?
friendship(including brothers)... and also life

8. What do you feel like doing right now?
going home...

9. If there’s someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
一切随缘走吧。。。XD

10.List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
(i) He's a bit leng zai lo... lol
(ii) He's very serious and willing to do anything when it comes to things he needs or he likes...
(iii) He's really good when comes to theory in kao lui-ing... XD

11.What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
一切随缘走吧。。。

12.What is the thing that will make you think he/she is bad?
when he/she does something(morally) very different(180 degrees) from what he/she always hangs in his/her mouth...

13.If you had to eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
err...

14.If you had a choice to be rich or happy, which one would you pick?
contented

15.If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
lazy... haihz

16. If you have/had a partner... or even trying to "pikat" her... have both of you ever looked in each other's eyes?? (this question is VERY IMPORTANT)
I haven't had a gf b4... lol... XD

17.What is the one thing you love about yourself?
emotional enough that i can act out any emotions i want in times of needs... XD

18.What is the type of song you like to listen to(Music Genre)?
好音乐（不管它是什么音乐。。。 不管是什么奏出来的或谁唱出来的。。。 总之能感动到我的音乐就是好音乐。。。）

19. What kind of supernatural powers u think u hav..?
sixth sense... but diss from others punya sixth sense... not saying it here now... don't feel like doing so.. XD

Tag: YH, Boon, Yan Ping, Mrs. Jung, Shu Ying, Qi Xiong, Siu Jeen, Win Zee... XD

Products from ma lao puo n maself... XD

Heyz.... sorry for not posting for such a long time... first... nothing much to write... then... no mood to write as well... just to keep this blog a little bit more alive... let me post this to you guyz... it's my recordings with my erhu... XD just a few songs... and also... don't expect much... it's not really that good... in fact... it's not good at all... XD

Alright... Here're the songs...

1. Colours of the wind
http://www.4shared.com/file/61201493/8b540407/colous_of_the_wind_final2.html

2.Fu Shi Shan Xia
http://www.4shared.com/file/61201243/3a7706f8/Fu_Shi_Shan_Xiafinal2.html

3.Chun Ni
http://www.4shared.com/file/64929711/284ef591/chun_nifinal.html


feel free to download the songs and listen to... just try not to vomit... if not your charis and computers'll get very dirty... XD comments seriously appreciated... XD feel free to say anything about the songs... XD enjoy... XD

PS: By the way... YH, Kar Yee, Leng Jie, Ching Sin... I think you guyz have the songs already... XD

From: Shawn
Zuo Hao

11.33am 29/09/2008

Beatboxing Flute... COOL!!!!! Must introduce... XD

Well.. I've to say sorry first... because i saw siu jeen's blog with the canon in d post... then i thought of this video that i used to introduce to everyone i know... XD i feel like plaguerising... XD sorry to everyone... haha... especially those who i've "copied" ideas from... XD

Well... I guess all of you know about beatboxing... the cool thingy that they use mouth to do some seriously cool tempos and beats... XD well... here's something different... beatboxing using flute... well... it's seriously VERY difficult!!! i'm not going to explain all the science inside to show you how difficult it is... or else i'm going to write a SUPER LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG blog again... and i don't want to do that... firstly i don't have much time left and secondly... people are starting to comment about my pots being too long again... XD just know that it's much much much more difficult than the normal beatboxing... XD

Here're the videos... XD :

Mario Brothers Remix(Flute Beatboxing)



Inspector Gadget Remix(Flute Beatboxing)




Well... Here's a challenge to those band members... I DARE you guys to do it... muahahahaha... XD no offense though... XD hope ou enjoy the videos... XD Comments appreciated... XD


From: Shawn 9.17pm Thursday 04 September 2008
Zuo Hao

Letting go... It helps... XD

"All your posessions are like a cup of tea... If you can't let it go(put it down)... Obviously your hand will break... Hence, we must learn to put the cup of tea downwhenever we're doing something else... and lift it up only when we want to drink it..."
This is what my father told me once... Why do we have to be so rigid and obsessed about everything??!! Don't we get tired??

"There was once a very wise man... He had two desciples... There was once he brought them to a trip... They were walking and walking and walking... until they saw a very pretty and sexy looking lady in a river... the clothings.. the looks... the everything you can imagine of... just so sexy... she was really struggling with the current and just couldn't cross the river... The wise man saw it... and carried her across the river.. which took about 10 minutes... the desciples saw the incident and was very uncomfortable with it... that was totally against their principles of life... they're not supposed to carry a lady like that... but they didn't say anything... and they kept on walking... until about 6 hours later... the desciples just couldn't take it anymore and asked the wise man... "you see... this was not what you taught us everyday... this was actually totally against it... so why did you do that??!! why did you carry the lady like that??!!"The wise man immediately understood what they meant and gave no answer but just smilled and said:"well... i was just carrying the lady for about 10 minutes... that's all... but you two... you two actually carried the lady for 6 hours..."
this story was told to me by my biology tuition teacher... one of the best fathers and teachers in the world...i seriously mean it... BEST father... XD

Well... I'm not going to talk about the teacher over here... nor am i going to talk about letting go some girl or relatoinship or something like that... I'm just going to talk about letting go some unnecessary posessions in our life... solid posessions or even mental posessions... XD

A lot of us are actually obsessed about things... Exams... Our diamond rings... Our necklaces.. and now... even some of them are obsessed... and i really mean obsessed about their hairstyle... can't even let that one single strand of hair go messy... And also... no offense... some even about religion...

well... since it's so late... it's about 12am now... i'm not going to write that long winded stupid story again... maybe i'll just share a bit about my views towards religionS... XD then i guess you guys will get the whole picture about my view towards letting go... XD

since i'm a buddhist... and also a very open one... XD I'm not so particular about those rules in Buddhism... although i'm a vegetarian... but i'm doing that mainly because of health purpose... not religous purpose... I don't talk about those fancy words in those sutras... although they're very helpful and useful in understanding the Buddha... but then... some of them just get too obsessed about it and just come out with their own rules... which are not really practical... which i also call... 走火入魔... XD no offense... seriously...

the problem is... they tend to get so rigid until it's like... nothing is right if you put it in a different way... By the way... let me share with you guys the defination of right and wrong in my dictionary... Right=Wrong... to me... XD well... to me... there's no right or wrong... people might feel that they're right... but you feel that they're wrong... i mean...don't talk about those facts that're already proven... just talk about viewing an incident or case... right and wrong is basically depending only on your own view and principles... that's why i seldom say:You're right and he's wrong" or things like that... because it's just my own view... i can only say...i agree with what you do or this is not how i do things... sorry... XD

well... back to the topic... I have to say... I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so sorry if i offended anyone in this post... because this is just my view... what i believe... you can disagree with it... but please... don't make a fuss out of it and create a whole lot of problems... well... as i said... i'm a very open minded person... i can accept anything as long as i feel that it's correct... i don't understand why people won't go to the places which are not follwing their religion... because 'm the type of person that goes to the church or mosque or hindu temples if someone invites me to go... to me... i'm just learning things from other religions... of course... every religion has something good... in fact... most of the things are good... or else it'll be called an agama sesat already... so i don't understand... why won't people go to temples... mosques...or anywhere that's so called interfering with their religions??

what is a religion anyway... well... my point of view: it's just a very simple guideline to humanity... that's all... the Buddhism i know tells me that the Buddha is actually in your heart... together with you... it's just the matter of realising the fact... "The person closest to God is not the person who is always talking about God... But always talking about humanity... The person who's atalking about God all the time but doing things in a totally opposite manner... is the person who's furthest from God..." this is what i believe in... XD

Talking about vegetarians as well... does that mean that if i'm a vegetarian... i can't eat meat?? NO... Not at all!!! it's basically only a choice of mine... it's because i choose not to eat meat and that's why i'm a vegetarian now... get it clear... it's not commutative... XD the reason why i choose not to eat meat is just simply because of first thing... health... second... i don't feel like getting other living beings hurt just for my pleasure of eating... XD that's why i don't understand... why can people be so extreme until whenever they go to any restaurants... the spoons must not been used by those non-vegetarians... the wok and cooking apparatus must be new... and everything... they're just making their life ery difficult... it's not like they're allergic to meat or something like that... XD what if one day... they're going to die because of not eating... and they just refuse to eat just because the wok has been used to cook meat before?? are they just going to die like that?? well... to me... as long as they keep their mind track right... and they're very clear of what they're doing... it's nothing really really wrong... we need to survive man...

well... i do hope that you guys get my whole picture about obsessions... XD just by reading this post about religion... just try to link it to everyday life... then you'll know what i mean... seriouslly... we really need to let go sometimes in our life... 有舍才有得.. it's true... XD puting things down sometimes may be a challenge to us... but take up the challenge... and live with it... don't be a coward!!!(quoted from Pn Tan Tiu Hang.. XD) be successful in life with whatever you have... but not by being obsessed in trying to get something that you yourself couldn't handle well... but don't misunderstand me... i'm not asking you to take every songle easy way out of life whenever you can... try your best in every single thing and have no regrets... even if you don;t meet your target... don't get so obsessed about it and get yourself all crazy... XD have to quote something again... XD from My FM... XD 把每件简单的事做好就是不简单。。。把每件平凡的事做好就是不平凡。。。 XD

guess that's all i'm going to share now... haven't done my maths and physics homework... XD bye bye... hope you guys enjoyed this post... XD comments appreciated... XD

Tell Me Why-Declan Galbraith

Well... After seeing YH introducing some singers on his blog(lol... XD)... I felt like introducing this boy to you guyz strongly... especially after i listened to his song just now... which is the one i'm going to post on this post... XD



Tell Me Why-Declan Galbraith

In my dream,children sing
A song of love for every boy and girl
The sky is blue and fields are green:
And laughter is the language of the world
Then i wake and all i see
Is a world full of people in need
Tell me why(why) does it have to be like this?
Tell me why (why) is there something i have missed?
Tell me why (why) cos i don't understand
When so many need somebody
We don't give a helping hand Tell me why?

Everyday i ask myself
What will i have to do to be a man?
Do i have to stand and fight
To prove to everybody who i am?
Is that what my life is for
To waste in a world full of war?
Tell me why(why) does it have to be like this?
Tell me why (why) is there something i have missed?
Tell me why (why) cos i don't understand
When so many need somebody
We don't give a helping hand ?
(declan)tell me why?(children)tell me why?
(declan)tell me why?(children)tell me why?
(declan)tell me why?(children)tell me why?
(together) just tell me why, why, why?

Tell me why(why) does it have to be like this?
Tell me why (why) is there something i have missed?
Tell me why (why) cos i don't understand
When so many need somebody
We don't give a helping hand ?

Tell me why (why,why,does the tiger run)
Tell me why(why why do we shoot the gun)
Tell me why (why,why do we never learn)
Can someone tell us why we let the forest burn?
(why,why do we say we care)
Tell me why(why,why do we stand and stare)
Tell me why(why,why do the dolphins cry)
Can some one tell us why we let the ocean die?
(why,why if we're all the same)
Tell me why(why,why do we pass the blame)
Tell me why (why,why does it never end)
Can some one tell us why we cannot just be friends?
Tell me why why




The first time i heard this song... I was blown away by his powerful voice!!! not to mention also about the powerful MV... i just love the MV... especially after being intensified by the black colour background... just make the whole thing so strong!!! and also... he was only about 10 years old when he was recording this song!!! wow!!! i felt so shameful after listening to this song... XD but then... the Declan now... let me so dissapointed that i feel like hitting him whenever i listen to his new songs... *no offense* T.T

Just some information about Declan Galbraith:

He was born on 19th december 1991(Cool... only 12 days older than me... XD)(But he's so suacessful... and me... T_T"")... He's a part Irish and part Scottish... His first publicly acknowledged performance was at the age of 7, when he insisted on performing at the annual Rochester Dickens Festival where people would dress up as Victorians to celebrate the life of Charles Dickens and his links with the town of Rochester. It was soon after this when he started entering local talent shows and within a year he had won 15 competitions and more than £1000. He sings, plays the guitar and also the piano... (WOW!!!) His first recording was a version of ‘Walking In The Air’, which was released on a special Christmas Hits album also featuring Westlife, Elton John and Elvis Presley among many others. On March 29, 2003 he won 'Best Young International Performer' at the 'Twenty-Fourth Annual Young Artist Awards'. He also appeared on the Louis Theroux documentary.

Albums: -2002: Declan
-2006: Thank You
-2007: You and Me

Singles: -Tell me why (2002)
-Love of My Life (2007)
-Ego You (2007)

Well... guess that's all about him for now... XD have to admit... i copied and pasted most of the information from another website... XD

Children Nowadays... How will they be in the future?? i mean near future...

"A Child is like a piece of white paper... And his/her parents are like a pen... how the child will grow up will depend on how the parents teach him... juz like how the paper will look like will depend on what is written on the paper by the pen..."

I think everyone viewing this post should have heard this quote before... XD so lemme tell u guyz a story about this... XD

Juz back home... went to input some knowledge...(Man... My english seriously sucks!!!) when i was there... at about 9.30am... i saw an incident that triggered me to post this post... XD

There were 2 children in the house, and a maid as well... the children woke up at about 9.30am... n just before that the maid went upstairs and came down... which i think is to wake the children up... XD it took the children about 15 minutes to come downstairs... and just when they reached downstairs... the maid came out from the kitchen, carrying a bowl of Maggi Mee and two cups of drink(I think it's Milo... XD) to them... Five minutes later, the maid came out with another bowl of Maggi Mee for the other child... Wow... The Maggi Mee smelled really nice!!! maybe it's because i hadn't have my breakfast... XD And what's more?? besides breakfast served in front of them(without needing them to prepare themselves) just when they woke up, one of them even sat in front of the tv... took out his playstation... and played while eating the bowl of noodles!!! and he took about an hour to finish the bowl of noodles... Wow!! talk about enjoying life... T_T""

By now... you might ask... "Are you posting this just because you're jealous of them for having such a good familly which allows them to do nothing??" well... Seriously... i'm NOT jealous of them... it just occured to me that... Some of the children nowadays can grow up doing basically nothing... and i mean nothing besides doing their homework, study well and besides that... just enjoying life... Just wondering... What will they become when they grow up... will they be just smart in books but not in life?? how will they deal with problems?? to me... they seem so vulnerable... that even the slightest problem could just defeat them until they can't stand up again... unless... they're helped by the others... and even with that... some of them might not even be able to stand up... is that worthy for me to be jealous of?? obviously... NO...

Just when i saw the incident... A sentence came flowing in my mind immediately: Thanks Mom... I couldn't have posted this and had so much thinking going on without you...

Just let me tell you briefly how i grew up... the bad parts first... i had been slapped by my mom while she's pulling my hair... now you don't really see that many mothers doing that do you?? XD i was driven to a highway and left there for quite a few minutes... sitting down... shivering... not knowing what to do... and i was only in standard two during the time... If my memory does not creating an illusion in my mind... XD and i was scolded and yelled and beaten and slapped and canned for almost everyday last time... now i have to admit.. confess as well... i was very very very very Very VEry VERy VERY lazy when i was in primary school... i can just leave every single homework of mine undone... that's why i got all those punishments... XD until i was in standard 6... when i grew up a little(I think)... i started doing my homework... and i got less punishments(of course) then...

The good part now... (Although some of you might think it's not that good... XD) My parents dragged me everywhere they go... No matter i like it or not... no matter how dirty it is... no matter how embarrassing i felt it was... they made me do everything they did... those they feel that's needed for me to grow up into what am i now... although i have to admit... i seriously HATED those days... but now... thinking about it back then... it actually helped me A LOT in my life... 1st thing... going to the market...Just let me ask first... how many of you knows how to choose a vegetable/fruits... ladies fingers... how do you choose the young ones... tomatoes... how do you choose the fresh ones... watermelons... how do you choose the nice ones... when do you buy the best watermelons... durians... how do you choose the best ones... not to mention some normal leavy vegetables... all of these i learnt in the market... and guess why... it's simply because my mom was helping my grandfather in selling vegetables in the market when she was a small kid... and she feels that it's really important to know this... (Thanks mom.. XD) then... talk about cooking... how many of you guyz is able to cook a complete meal( and i don't mean eating maggi mee for lunch or dinner)XD... simple ones... and plan which dishes to cook... in order to have complete nutrients in a meal... let me tell you... just the planning part can already kill your brains man... i couldn't do it before this... but now... i'm so proud to say that... i can prepare and cook a dinner whenever my mom doesn't feel ike doing it!!! just because my mom insisted all of us in the house helping her in the kitchen... or at least observing her cooking whenever she's in the kitchen... YEAH!!! XD then... talk about planting vegetables... my dad had a piece of empty land just behind his house when he used to live in johor... and therefore... he plants vegetables there... takes care of them... and bla bla bla... you know... do whatever a garderner will do... XD now... he leaves a small piece of land empty behind my house... and planted some vegetables there... and had me planted some vegetables... although i was so lazy to take care of them... and left it to my maid... XD but trust me... i do know how to do them... just that i'm lazy... XD

i could write a 5000 words post if i keep on doing this... just to summarize... i'm not going to brag about myself in this post... XD you'll be able to know more about me when this blog continues... if i have the willpower to continue it... XD well i grew up in a life which is full of suffer... if you view it in a way that you're doing the things you hate... but full of experiences and knowledge if you view it in another way... XD

Summary: Finally...I'm getting to the point after all those crap i typed just now... Hope you guys are not asleeped by now... XD when i saw the children... the first sentence that came out of my mouth was:现在的孩子真的很好命... but do they get as much knowledge that are needed in life?? that you can't survive battling challenges in life without them?? i don't think so... so parents... or even future parents who are reading this... do you want to raise a child that needs someone to look after even after you are unable to look after them?? well... i don't... XD teens... even if you parents did not ask you to do stuffs that they do... just because they care for you so much until they don't want to see you getting hurt... just volunteer yourself to do it... or at least help in it... just to train yourself well... so that you'll be a tough person to face life... no matter you're a guy or a girl... well... best wishes and good luck in life... XD let's make this life a beautiful and meaningful one... XD

PS: i'm so sorry for my crappy english... and my super long winded boring "so called story"... that's one of my problems... ppl try to write long posts... but i can't seem to write short ones... anyway... hope you'd enjoy it... XD and also sorry if i made you buy eye-mo... XD comments appreciated... XD hope you guyz got what i wanted to say in this post.... XD


From: Shawn
Zuo Hao

我的人生。。。真的会让我绝望吗？？

“世界可以是灰的。。。你身边的人也可以是黑白的。。。可是，千万不要忘记。。。你本身是充满色彩的。。。你的人生是什么样子。。。就只靠你怎样把那些彩色散播到你的周围。。。”

时常告诉别人这句话。。。 一看见别人开始蓝蓝(sorry lokmun... 不是要针对蓝色。。。 只是太习惯了。。。)/灰灰的时候。。。 就开始讲一大堆道理。。。 总是少不了这句话。。。 可是。。。今天。。。煮午餐的时候。。。 不知为什么。。。 整个人的心情突然跌下来了。。。 好恐怖的感觉。。。 记得以前在“灰色世界”的时候(F3&4&5)。。。 也是会这个样子的。。。 我不想再到回那时候的我。。。 我真的不想！！！

我今天也没什么跟人接触到。。。怎么会这样呢？？ 唉。。。是我太累了吗？？ 也不会阿。。。 恐怖。。。

最近看见他跟别人比较接近的时候。。。都会有一种莫名其妙的酸酸得感觉。。。 可是不对啊。。。我很确定我对他没感觉啊。。。 可是怎么会这样？？ 又是因为心里的天空变灰了吗？？ 我不想它变黑。。。我真的很怕这次会迷路。。。逃不出来。。。唉。。。

刚才一到古筝前面的时候。。。我的手就自动弹了首萍聚。。。心情也不知为什么的。。。也跟着继续往下走。。。是什么事呢？？又有人要从我现在记忆中的世界离开了吗？？还是又要变成令一个人了？？唉。。。我不要。。。。

第一次写部落格就酱灰。。。真的有一点。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。不知怎么说的感觉。。。我到底是怎么啦？？？？？？！！！！！！！！！！！ 我不要这个样子！！！！

我开始又散播不到颜色了。。。我。。。还能够起来吗？？要多久的时间呢？？